OU-OSU Clash: A Classic Contest Of Good vs. Evil
This is an article that ran several years ago in either the Tulsa World or Tulsa Tribune. Written by Clark W. Duffe, the article very simply explains the classic clash of good versus evil that will happen today in that strange little town near Oklahoma City.
This saturday there will be a clash of good and evil in our state, a monumental struggle between the forces of decency and light and those of licentiousness and darkness. The field of battle will be a rectangular surface of artificial grass and a multitude of followers will witness the conflict sadly unaware of its true significance.
For this shall not be a mere football game between the University of Oklahoma and Oklahoma State University, but a preview of armageddon. Read on as I explain the true natures of the opponents.
Let me begin with an examination of the teams’ names. “Sooners”, for anyone not versed in Oklahoma history, were common criminals who broke the law and entered the unassigned lands before they were officially opened for settlement, thereby cheating honest citizens out of a fair chance at the land.
Cowboys, on the other hand, are fun-loving rascals with a strong sense of right and wrong. You may use John Wayne as an excellent example. The mascot of OSU, Pistol Pete, was a famous marshal. A lawman, not a criminal. Note also, please, the cowboys wear white hats, or helmets in this case.
Also of interest, concerning the helmets is the OSU insignia. Its oval shape recalls the egg of life, a universal symbol for birth and peace. The interlocking O and U of the Sooner’s helmets resembles a stylized ram’s horn, which is an equally well known symbol of pagan beliefs.
Using numerology, the words “University of Oklahoma” can be shown to equal 6-6-6 or 666, the number of the beast in the Bible. (for a complete explanation of how this frightening truth was discovered, send $50.00 in small, unmarked bills to me in care of this newspaper).
People from OSU don’t believe in nonsense like numerology.
Let us now consider the team’s colors. Oklahoma wears red, the color of international communism. It was also the hue worn by the dread torturers of the Spanish inquisition and by the oppressive Britishers during our glorious war of independence. And who among us can forget the garish sunburst of crimson on the Japanese flags of World War II? Only a sense of decency prevents me from dwelling upon the obvious similarities between Sooner red and the red of spilled human blood.
The Cowboys, on the other hand, wear orange, the color of the glowing embers of a quiet campfire and of happy, smiling jack-o-lanterns. Oranges themselves are a valuable source of vitamin C to keep our children healthy. And what in the world is more beautiful than a summer sunset? You know what color that is.
Even the names of the towns where the schools are located are informative. Think of Norman and you think of the Norman conquests where thousands were killed or maimed in the name of brutal land grabbing. Couple that with the aforementioned nickname “Sooners” and things do not seem so coincidental anymore. It’s almost as if a fiendish plot was at work.
And you know who the crazed killer was in Alfred Hitchcock’s “psycho”. Norman bates, of course.
Compare this, if you will, with Stillwater. Still…water. It brings on visions of calm, reflective times, of crystalline pools of refreshing water. And water, you know, is the most important substance on earth. Without it our world would be as dead as the moon. Makes you think, doesn’t it?
I could go on and on but I believe my point is well made. Obviously, this is not merely a frivolous contest between college boys, but a fundamental struggle that reaches to the deepest parts of our souls.
And so, when the kick-off comes around this Saturday, I think you know what i’ll be doing: rooting for the side of truth, justice and the American way.
By Clark W. Duffe
