Yesterday’s News

The Newspaper Association of America (NAA), the main auditing source for America’s newspapers, has reported that ad revenue for newspapers has suffered its biggest decline since the 1950s. Online advertising for newspapers is growing but it has not been able to offset the losses in print-ad revenue. Trends show that the problem is worsening.

More and more, people are using other sources for their news at the direct expense of the daily newspaper. Local TV doesn’t count any more since local TV news programs have decided to act as your nanny or parent instead of real news reporting. Cable TV news seems to be existing on political programming with pretty people and glorified “experts.” Leaving, for those who desire to really be informed, the enormous space that is called the world wide web.

So, here are a few suggestions for the dying newspaper: 

  • More comics. And, in color please, you have 4-color presses so use ’em!
  • More puzzles. In most papers the puzzles are worth the price of the paper alone. So, why not super-size it?
  • Stop excerpting wire reports and write in-depth articles. We are already reading the wire services – get it?
  • Fix that smudgy ink that ends up on our finger tips. They have ways to do this….
  • If you charge for access to your news websites, we are going elsewhere. (psst…we already have)
  • Stop charging the price of a Sunday edition for a daily edition.
  • Add a lovely scent so it will smell nice when our pets crap on your product.
  • Stop using your newspaper as a political vehicle.
  • Accept reality, and your eventual fate.

Author: Lumbergh Sales Manager

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